Morality

How to Control Anger?

Published On: April 19, 2023 , Updated on : February 22, 2024

Control Your Anger, Before it Controls You.

 

After reading this title many of you will think that this topic is absolutely related to them because Nowadays levels of patience and self-control are decreasing very fastly among new age kids and youngsters compared to a mature aged person. Many situations are triggering the problems of anger and aggressiveness in people due to their job, career, family issues and money supply.  We all want that every work should be done according to what we think and that too immediately. If this does not happen then the demon of anger overpowers us and the situation will be out of control.

The ability to manage your anger and remain calm under pressure has a direct link to your performance. I think controlling anger causing events keeps the brain more alert and you perform better when you are alert no matter in which field you are, either it will be study or it may be a job.

Those under the control of anger have been proclaimed by Bhagavad Gita to be of demoniac nature, and the ones free from anger are stated to be of divine nature. Sri Krishna has, in fact, declared anger to be one of the three gates of hell in 21st shloka of 16th chapter.

 

त्रिविधं नरकस्येदं द्वारं नाशनमात्मन: |
काम: क्रोधस्तथा लोभस्तस्मादेतत्त्रयं त्यजेत् ||

There are three gates leading to the hell of self-destruction for the soul—lust, anger, and greed. Therefore, one should abandon all three.(16.21).

Not only the causes and effects, Bhagavad Gita has also discussed the ways of conquering the anger. Instead of dealing only with the symptoms, it has stressed upon curbing the root cause of anger, which is stated to be the lust. Anger arises out of lust and constrains man to indulge in evil deeds. Anger can thus be controlled by shunning lust.

Unless one brings his likes and dislikes under control, it is not possible to conquer anger. A slave of his likes and dislikes is a slave of his emotions. The real freedom lies in not getting overly attached to or woefully bound by any object, activity or situation.

 

How to Control Anger??

Anger can be a powerful and destructive force, but it can also be harnessed for positive change. Anger is a natural emotion that can arise in response to a variety of situations, but it can also become a destructive force if left unchecked. Uncontrolled anger can lead to strained relationships, lost opportunities and even physical harm to oneself or others. There are a few techniques for controlling anger and turning it into a positive force.

 

Identify the Triggers

The first step in controlling anger is to identify what triggers it. This can be anything from a specific person or situation to an internal thought or feeling. Once you know what sets you off, you can start to develop strategies for managing your reactions.

 

Practice Relaxation Techniques

Relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation or yoga, can help you calm down when you feel yourself becoming angry. These techniques can help you focus on the present moment, rather than dwelling on past events or worrying about the future.

 

Practice Empathy

Empathy involves putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and trying to understand their perspective. When you’re angry, it can be easy to focus solely on your own feelings and needs. Practicing empathy can help you see things from the other person’s point of view and find common ground.

 

Take a Break

Sometimes, the best way to control anger is to simply take a break. This can involve stepping away from the situation or engaging in a relaxing activity. This can give you time to cool down and approach the situation with a clear head.

 

Don’t hold a Grudge

Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. Forgiving someone who angered you might help you both learn from the situation and strengthen your relationship.

 

Seek Professional Help

If you find that your anger is becoming a persistent problem that is affecting your relationships or quality of life, it may be time to seek professional help. A therapist can help you identify the root causes of your anger and develop strategies for managing it in a healthy way.

By considering these all, you can learn to control your anger and turn it into a positive force for growth and change. Remember, controlling your anger can lead to a happier, healthier life for you and those around you.

 

A Lesson from Ratan Tata.

We need to learn a lesson from Ratan Tata on how to overcome anger and carve out a successful path for yourself.

 Ratan Tata, is known for revolutionizing the automobile sector in India, with the introduction of Tata Indica in the 1990s. But back in the day, what was essentially seen as a landmark achievement didn’t yield the desired results. 

It was Ratan Tata’s dream project, but the car failed to make its mark in the market. Due to the poor sales, Tata Motors decided to sell the car division.

In 1999, Ratan Tata decided to sell its car business to Ford. Ratan Tata along with his team flew to Detroit and met the chairman of Ford, Bill Ford. In a meeting that lasted three hours, Ratan Tata apparently felt humiliating treatment. Bill had told them that they knew nothing about cars and they shouldn’t have started the car division. He even went as far as saying that Ford was doing Tata a favor by buying his car division.

At that time, Ratan Tata was feeling very angry and disappointed, but anyhow he drank a bitter sip of anger and left detroit. After coming back to India, Ratan Tata decided not to sell the car division. He put all his focus on Tata Motors and worked even harder. 

Failure is the greatest motivation, and Success is the greatest revenge. 

The tables turned nine years later, and Ratan Tata grabbed that moment. After the humiliation in the US in 1999, the clock turned a full circle and Tata got his chance back to take revenge with ford. Ford was on the verge of bankruptcy after the 2008 global financial meltdown. By taking over the auto company’s iconic Jaguar- Land Rover brands for $2.3 billion Ratan Tata took sweet revenge. 

Ford chairman Bill Ford thanked Ratan Tata, saying “you are doing us a big favor by buying JLR.” Not only did Tata buy JLR, but they turned it into one of their most successful  ventures. 

Within a few years of the buyout, JLR made a dramatic turnaround and is the mainstay of Tata Motors’s finances. Jaguar and Land Rovers are one of the most successful selling cars of Tata Motors.

 So, in this way Ratan Tata controlled his anger and created a golden future for himself, his company and all the employees of his company. If Ratan Tata had lost control of his anger at that time and had taken a contrary decision, he would never have been as successful as he is today.

 

A Lesson from Swami Vivekananda.

The story of Swami Vivekananda, a spiritual leader and philosopher who played a key role in introducing Hinduism and Yoga to the western world, is also an example of controlling anger.

During his youth, Swami Vivekananda was known for his fiery and impulsive temperament. However, through years of meditation and self-discipline, he was able to transform his anger into a force for positive change.

One incident that exemplifies Swami Vivekananda’s control over his anger occurred during his visit to the United States in 1896.

In the United States, once  a Christian asked a question to Swami Vivekananda with the intention to mock Swami Vivekananda and to prove that christianity is much better than Hinduism. He pointed towards a pile of books which were placed in such a way that the Bhagavad Githa was placed at the bottom of the pile, followed by other religious books and the Bible was placed at the top of the pile.

He questioned Swami, Do you like the way books are arranged?”

Swami Vivekananda replied, I sure do. The books are very organized and arranged neatly. The ones on the top stand firmly because the foundation is exceedingly strong.”

That man was annoyed to see this, he wasn’t expecting this answer. If we were in Swami Vivekananda’s place, we would have got angry seeing this, but very coolly he gave him a befitting reply and increased the importance of our Bhagavad Gita in the mind of the public over there. 

Again, During a lecture in New York, a heckler in the audience began to insult and make disruptive comments.

Rather than responding with anger or aggression, Swami Vivekananda remained calm and composed, and he continued his lecture without interruption. Later, when asked how he was able to maintain his composure in the face of such provocation, he replied, “I saw God in that man, and I could not strike him.”

Through his ability to see the divine in all beings, Swami Vivekananda was able to control his anger and respond with compassion and understanding. This incident serves as a powerful example of how we can transform our anger into a force for positive change by cultivating empathy and compassion for others.

 

Conclusion 

So, In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to say something but to have self  control for a few minutes can save from damaging both sides. Remember, getting angry is not going to fix anything or it won’t make you feel better (may actually make you feel worse).

If you don’t control your anger, your Life will be filled with frustration, pain, loss, and the unpredictable actions of others. Controlling your angry responses can keep your surroundings near and dear to you.